2020 SUMMER LYRIC CONTEST WINNERS
Thanks to our Lyric Contest Director, Alexis Tapp for comments below.
Semi-Finalists
One Rich Man by T Edwin Doss and Robert Gann, Bumpass String, VA
The Seeds of Joy by Catherine Pittman, Clackamas, OR
Cornbread by Don Wall, Dallas, TX
Today is Tomorrow by Will Hoover, Henderson, Nevada
Any Words Can Make A Song by Will Hoover, Henderson, Nevada
FIRST PLACE: One Rich Man by T Edwin Doss and Robert Gann, Bumpass String, VA
Robert Gann/T. Edwin Doss - lyrics
T. Edwin Doss – music
Don’t be concerned with these worn out shoes I’m wearing.
This old coat and hat, they’re gonna be just fine.
Don’t be fooled by this little shack I live in.
God’s building me a mansion on the other side.
CHORUS:
You may look at me and say there goes a poor man.
My clothes ain’t new….There’s dirt upon these hands,
But I’ll be walking streets of gold
when your silver turns to sand.
I know that you don’t see this……
but I’m one rich man.
What good will your silver and diamonds do
On that day when you’re laid to rest?
I’ll be laying up my treasures “over yonder”
So when I face the Lord, I’ll know I’ve done my best.
Chorus
Bridge: Not concerned about the finer things of this world.
So much more waits in eternity.
I live by faith in a man called Jesus.
He died for me that day on Calvary
You may look at me and say there goes a poor man.
My clothes ain’t new….There’s dirt upon these hands,
But I’ll be walking streets of gold
when your silver turns to sand.
I know you don’t see this……
But I’m one rich man. ….
Ooooohh....I know you don’t see this
But you’re looking at one rich man
Lyric Judge Comments: I enjoyed your lyric very much. My suggestions in red are for a smoother flow and rhythm. Your structure works well, and your song idea is uplifting. I hope you’ll record this and enter it into the annual song contest if you haven’t already.
SECOND PLACE: The Seeds of Joy by Catherine Pittman, Clackamas, OR
©2019 Catherine Pittman
Verse I
Long, Long Ago, one winter night,
A child was born to bring us light.
A gift of wonder to behold,
He slept… upon His hay of gold.
Verse 2
From kingdoms far, the wisemen three
Came Bearing gifts for their new king
A lowly stable, manger bed…
That’s where the star above them led.
CHORUS:
For the Lord,so loved this weary world,
He gave his only son!
The seeds of joy were born that night,
Sweet child of hope and light.
Verse 3
While shepherds watched on hillsides green
Beneath a star’s bright loving beam
Appeared an angel, ‘ore the trees,
They fell and praised on bended knees.
Verse 4
Be not afraid; the angels sing,
Songs of Joy is what I bring,
In Bethlehem, you shall see,
A babe, a King, the prince of peace
CHORUS:
Ending:
Mere echoes now: Messiah's song,
It's old as time,still growing strong,
His love burns brightly this Christmas night!
He, lovingly, gave us His light!
Burning brightly, this Christmas night
He, lovingly, gave us His light!
Lyric Judge Comments: I really enjoyed your timely lyric. I’ve included suggestions in red, because the manner in which you structured your stanzas made your lyric quite difficult to read, and especially your chorus. Keeping to four lines for each verse makes it much clearer for judging and for song pitches. I’ve added a few words in each verse for the sake of improved meter and rhythm. A bridge is not necessary, but because you’ve got four verses, you might consider making a bridge of one of them. Nice job. I don’t know if you’ve already recorded this, but I hope you’ll enter this as a completed song into the annual contest if you haven’t already done so.
THIRD PLACE: Cornbread by Don Wall, Dallas, TX
C -Cornbread, cornbread, cornbread, ice tea
Don’t forget to eat your black-eyed peas
That’s a Texas feast on New Year’s Eve
I wasn’t born here; I may not die here
But I got Texas in my genes
V-Yankee this, Yankee that
I broke down and bought a hat
Barbecue, chicken fry
I gained weight, that’s no lie
Jalapenos, margaritas
Gorgeous Texas senoritas
On the highway, feeling mean
Got me a plate with refried beans
C-And some Cornbread, cornbread, cornbread, ice tea
Don’t forget to eat your black-eyed peas
That’s a Texas feast on New Year’s Eve
I wasn’t born here; I may not die here
But I got Texas in my genes
V- July 4th went to Austin
Spent the day with Willie Nelson
Hippies, rednecks, bikers, smokers
Bought a brand new pair of Ropers (I WOULD CUT “ME”)
NOW I FIT IN. I BELONG HERE.
With my ice chest full of cold beer
Cowboy dreams, blue eyes cryin’
It’s a whiskey river, man, I ain’t lyin’ (I WOULD CUT “MAN”)
C- And I like Cornbread, cornbread, cornbread, ice tea
Don’t forget to eat your black-eyed peas
That’s a Texas feast on New Year’s Eve
I wasn’t born here; I may not die here
But I got Texas in my genes
V- I’ve lived round Dallas 30 years
People still know I ain’t from here
But I’ve been through bout every town
I’ve seen the sunrise and the hail come down
I must say I’ve reached a nexus
In this nation state called Texas
Born and raised here, my kids say
They would never want to move away
C-And they like Cornbread, cornbread, cornbread, ice tea
Don’t forget to eat your black-eyed peas
That’s a Texas feast on New Year’s Eve
And the kids say, we were born here; we’re gonna die here
Cause we got Texas in our genes
(repeat chorus)
JUDGE’S COMMENTS: CATCHY, CUTE AND ORIGINAL. GREAT CHORUS. VERY PERFORMANCE FRIENDLY. I’VE OFFERED VERY FEW SUGGESTIONS. AS A BORN AND BRED TEXAN, I CAN CERTAINLY RELATE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ENTRY AND MAKING ME SMILE.
FOURTH PLACE: Today is Tomorrow by Will Hoover, Henderson, Nevada
Sparks start fires, fires die out.
Sorrow weeps, anger shouts.
The hopeful dream, the lonely cry.
The earth endures, as time flies by.
Lights go dark, close your eyes.
Something's born, something dies.
A new day dawns, then it’s gone.
Time won't wait, life goes on.
CHORUS
Today is tomorrow when swift the river flows.
We will never know where all the time goes.
Dusk Darkness Dawn
Another day’s gone.
Say hello, say goodbye.
Don't ask why, no don't ask why.
Today is tomorrow when swift the river flows.
We will never know where all the time goes.
Time flies by, clouds roll in.
Winners lose and losers win.
Open windows, open doors.
Try to learn what this life’s for.
Knowledge falls like summer rain.
What you lose and what you gain.
Ask the questions, read the clues.
Some you win and some you lose.
CHORUS
BRIDGE
All that you have done and all that you will do
All that you become… all that you will choose
All of it is real; all of it is true
Everything you feel, all of this is you.
The day begins and then it ends.
Virtue grins as evil sins.
Enemies turn into friends.
Find the good in what life sends.
Can we stay, must we go.
Can we learn, can we know
Why life starts, how it ends,
What it breaks, what it mends?
Sparks start fires, fires die out.
Sorrow weeps, anger shouts.
Today rolls on, yesterday is gone.
Time won't wait, life goes on.
OUTRO
Today is tomorrow when swift the river flows.
We will never know where all the time goes.
FIFTH PLACE: Any Words Can Make A Song by Will Hoover, Henderson, Nevada
Any words can make a song
There is no right; there is no wrong
Short or long, weak or strong
Any words can make a song
Any tune can sound OK
If the rhythm makes you sway
And the notes don’t go astray
Any tune can sound OK
CHORUS
But when I want my song to say “I love you”
The words I choose to say it must be right
The tempo and the harmony must capture all you mean to me
The melody must flow out smooth and light
I will love you every day and every night
Any words can make a song
Words to hang a feeling on
Any fool can do it wrong
Any words can make a song
Any tune can sound OK
Any tune that you can play
But will the tune blow them away
Even if it sounds okay?
CHOURS
But when I want my song to say “I love you”
The words I choose to say it must be right
The tempo and the harmony must capture all you mean to me
The melody must flow out smooth and light
I will love you every day and every night
OUTRO
Any words can make a song
There is no right; there is no wrong
Short or long, weak or strong
Any words can make a song
Judge’s Comments: Cute and original. I have offered a few suggestions in red. I don’t really understand the word “always” at the end of each chorus; it doesn’t really feel necessary or add anything to the story. Please continue to work on this lyric as you have a good start.
