LC2025 Spring-Summer Winner
FIRST PLACE LYRIC with judge's comments: I absolutely love your lyric. It is so close to being complete.
I will first suggest that you always indicate with labels what is verse and chorus and bridge and any other sections you include. It will make your lyric more professional, and if you are pitching a song or entering or submitting it for any kind of consideration, it needs to be clearly marked. I'm not sure what to call the sections you included with the 2 lines, but they work for me although this is a bit of a different structure,
I also made a few changes to improve where the stresses would fall or for the sake of better flow of a few of your lines. Honestly, this is a different layout for a lyric, but it works for me. These words share your thoughts in an interesting, engaging, and fresh way.
The additions I made in red are mine.
The additions made in purple are just where I moved your section down to make it an outro.
I hope you’ll Trust me to have removed a few words. My goal is to help you make your lyric it’s best.
Congratulations on your work here. I hope you’ll submit again. I hope you’ll do something with this lyric.
From your DSA Lyric Judge, Alexis Tapp
The Moments Lost by Wayne Gathright, Austin, TX
Verse 1:
I lost a moment yesterday while shopping at the store
And when I searched to get it back, I lost a little more ...
I saw them flying in the wind and reached up in the air,
Yet when I looked inside my hand, there were no moments there…
The moments lost are like the clouds high up in the sky
Enjoy each moment while it’s there, before they float on by
Verse 2:
I thought I saw them in a stream as I stood on the shore
I tried to catch them, but I lost the ones I had before -
They floated down the winding creek and soon flowed out of sight
I realized what I’d lost and then … I began to cry ...
The moments lost are like water dripping from in your hand
They will slip away even if you hold - as tight as you can
Bridge: Don’t miss them when they happen, they will never come again
You can’t hold or possess them once they’re already spent
Verse 3: I sat and pondered what to do as time marched through the day,
And as I sat there deep in thought a lot more slipped away…
And while I wondered what went wrong they swept back like a breeze
For all the moments that I lost had changed to memories…
Outro: The moments lost are like the air like the air you breathe
Take it in and hold it, then it has to be released
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